|Artist's rendition of Buzz & Lorri|
|Innocent? I beg to differ.|
|"Be vewy quiet. I'm hunting mushwooms."|
|"I've got to hold perfectly still. Their vision is based on movement."|
|"City folk! Run!"|
|R.I.P. Larry, Darryl and Darryl|
|"Stay in the city."|
|"Beware, city folk! There are millions of us waiting for you!"|
|Mr. & Mrs. Biggacity|
|Mmmm. Fresh. Flavorful. Safe.|
You will find these roadside mushroom vendors to be both courteous and professional. While you're purchasing your mushrooms, try not to make eye contact and DO NOT, under any circumstances buy any of Ned's "special mushrooms." Also, if asked, you probably don't want to see the "critter" they have in the back of their truck. Leave the kids in the car and let the experience be another reminder of why you don't want to venture into the country.
We here in Southern Iowa would like to thank all you city folk for taking the time to read this public service message. And to remind you that due to the cold winter this year, all of our fish and wildlife have inexplicably died. So, please, stay in the city. There's nothing to see or do here at all. Really.
Thanks for reading!